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Review Analysis Defined

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Review System

Half a Cheeseburger:

Tiny Elvis chases you out of his yard with his Chesterfield, cursing you for bringing me just a half a burger of quality. Tiny Elvis on a rampage look out!

One Cheeseburger:

Tiny e fires off a couple rounds with his golden revolver at the TV after listening a couple times, I urge you to bring your game next time one burger is not enough for the King. You escape with your life.

One and a half Cheeseburgers:

Well you are getting there and I guess it was ok going down, but now its coming out the other end and my Kingly evidence suggests a bit more work. Nobody gets hurt this time…


Two Cheeseburgers:

It's a good effort yet there is something missing, maybe its fries maybe its more songs, maybe its more practice and a bit more focus.

Two and a Half Cheeseburgers:

The King meets you at the gate shakes your hand and stumbles back to the mansion. You are getting closer but you aren't quite there yet.

Three Cheeseburgers:

The Kings welcomes you to have some beers at his favorite bar but ducks out after a few rounds. He likes you but he knows you have more work ahead of you.

Three and a half Cheeseburgers:

The king has you over to kick back some cheap wine on his front lawn just before he slinks off and calls it a night after releasing the hounds. You are through the gate but not in the circle yet but you are almost there.

Four Cheeseburgers:

He invites you over to the mansion and sets you up with some 50-year-old cognac and plays some songs with ya. You got the flavor, you got the Flavor!

Four and a Half Cheeseburgers:

He has you over and lets you shoot his gun and drive one of His Cadillac's, you are on the in now baby.

5 Cheeseburgers

He buys you a fucking Cadillac welcome to the big time brother.

Expertise in Indie, emo, lo-fi, pop, punk, Psychedelic, Trip-hop, Jazz, Folk and Blues